Monday, May 19, 2008

Where I am...

I am frustrated and I feel confined. Words are escaping me at the moment. No, not escaping... too many to say.

Terry Taylor has expressed in poetry and song what I cannot seem to say presently in prose.

Love is a question mark
Life's in a shadow box
God hides himself sometimes
Inside a paradox

And there may not ever be
Anything new here to say
But I'm fond of finding words
That say it in a different way

Does everybody want it nicely
Lined up in little neat rows?
Does anybody know precisely
Just where the wild wind blows?
I can hand it to you brightly
Wrapped up in ribbons and bows

We could dance the same old dances
Learn all the same old ropes
Roll out the same safe songs
Tell all our tired jokes

We've got some walls to climb
We've got some gates to crash
We've got a fire to light
Burn down the pious trash

Ribbons and Bows from the album Mr. Buechner's Dream by Daniel Amos


Kay said...

Hey Andrew. I hope you're ok. I'm thinking of you.

Redlefty said...

Thinking of you as well.

Andrew said...

Thanks! I think going to see Caspian with the fam tonight will get me out of this funk.

Brook said...

something about classic albums that really help ground a person and realign one's perspective. I was listening to Undercover's Balance of Power the other day as well, and a line that was really sticking in my thoughts (that seems to pertain somehow to this also) is "A million questions burning...begging for the answers, continue looking through the eyes of love". That's one of the hardest things for me to do when facing frustration or betrayal or confusion or anything like that, is to stay grounded in something beyond all of it and continue looking through the eyes of love. my natural reaction is to harbor bitterness or frustrated judgementalism towards those who "just don't get it", or those who have hurt me (even when the source of that hurt is God or life itself, the way things are). Even though it continues to be a major temptation or tendency with me, I've long ago given up trying to change what others think. If I can't lead by example and be what I claim to think or believe, then I figure I should probably just shut up. why do I think I can change others if I can't change myself? Humility and love are the hardest things to cultivate and maintain, but the most essential.

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