Book of Job - Specific

On the drive back from Boise after seeing Brian McClaren, I had a chance to confide with my buds the angst I have with the book of Job. It is rather obsessive at times. I have wrote about it in a general sense in the past, but I thought I would throw out the main points and see what you think.

• It bothers me that two superior beings decided to torture a lesser being to see how much it could take. We would consider the behavior presented there to be sick if it were to happen in another circumstance (two kids torture a cat to hear it squeal).
• It bothers me that God basically got goaded into a cosmic pissing contest with someone who is evil. Does that not show poorly on him? Why should God give a rip what Satan thinks? (assuming Satan is the personification of evil we make him out to be)
  
• God put Job through that to win a bet. Could you imagine if you found out your father had killed your children, and tortured you, to prove to a colleague that you could keep it together. Notice that Job never knows what went on behind the scenes. Could you imagine what he would say if he knew. "You killed my children.... so you could win a bet??" Can you imagine how heart broken and betrayed he might feel?
  
• God tells Job he had no grounds to question Him. It is almost as if God realizes that He has been caught red handed, but can't apologize, so He gets verbally abusive with Job instead. That reaction seems pretty common amongst human fathers who have been caught in the wrong.
• Replacing my dead children with other children and material possessions could not be more offensive. Again, this strikes me as someone trying to make up for something they did wrong by overcompensating, but never confessing what they did.
• We are told that this is a story of the faithfulness of Job. Is it faithfulness? How many battered wives defend their abusive husbands? Often a battered wife tells the police "but he really does love me".
  

I saw this video on Youtube. It pretty much sums up how I feel about the book of Job.



I am not sure what to do with Job, so it sits on a shelf for me theologically. My best hope is that it never should have been canonized.

Book Meme

I have been tagged for a Meme on books (my favorite topic) by my fellow Utahn Kay. The hardest part will be trying to keep this brief. How does one keep succinct a discourse on one of life's greatest pleasures?

1 - One book that changed your life

Impossible. This cannot be limited to one. Do not all books stir us and move us? Still, let us give it a try. Here are a few:

ROMANS- A few months after converting to Christianity at 15 I started to memorize the book of Romans through Bible Quizzing. This was, and in many ways still is, the foundation of my theology. Particularly chapters 2 and 14 (the mind your own business chapters).

The Great Divorce by CS Lewis - This book helped me humanize a lot of doctrine. I have read this book no less than 15 times. His view of Hell and who goes there helped loosen me from the Hell, Fire, and Brimstone doctrines I grew up on.

Teachings on Love by Thich Nhat Hahn - There is NO greater book on the simple teaching of Love. This was the first book that showed me that I could learn deeply from Masters who were not of my faith (I know some of you are thinking "well duh!", but for me that was a big step).

A Generous Orthodoxy by Brian McLaren - In this book, Brian articulated much of what I had been thinking for years. There were only a few souls I shared these thoughts with... I was pretty sure I was a heretic. Now I am comfortable with my heresy. :)

2 - One book that you’ve read more than once

I read LOTS of books more than once. Books, like movies, need to be gone back to over and over. Most Lewis books I have read many, many times. Recently, I have re-read If Grace is True... by Phillip Gulley.

3 - One book you’d want on a desert island

For music, that would be easy (Violet Burning-Strength). How do I limit books to ONE? It may seem cliche' but I may have to go with the Bible on this one. That way I get many voices.

4 - Two books that made you laugh

Any Star Trek novel written by Peter David. He is one of the few authors who will make me laugh out loud while reading.

Bloom County by Berkely Breathed makes me laugh no matter how often I read them.

5 - One book that made you cry

I don't know that I actually cried when Fred Weasley died, but I was moved. There were a few times during the last HP book that I had to just set it down and have a quiet moment.

6 - One book that you wish had been written

A follow up to the book of Job... I have real problems with that book; it doesn't seem to fit. I hate how it portrays God.

7 - One book that you wish had never been written

Anything written by a televangelist (I was surprised to find out they were literate).

8 - Two books you’re currently reading

The Amber Spyglass by Phillip Pullman - It has been a while since I have enjoyed a fiction series this much. Wonderful!

The Wit and Wisdom of Gandhi - This is just a book of quotes I have been working through. I finally stopped highlighting, because the entire book was glowing.

9 - One book you’ve been meaning to read

I have a never ending list. Here is what is probably up and coming in the next few months (my reading will really pick up during summer vacation).

God and Empire - Dominic Crossan
Adam, Eve, and the Serpent - Elaine Pagels
The Prophets - Abraham J. Heschel
How to Expand Love - Dalai Lama
& a small stack of Walter Brueggemann

I tag two friends who share my love of hanging out in a bookstore with a good book and a hot cup of coffee. Brook and Carrie.

I'm sorry... Job is a sick story

Went and saw Stryper with Brook, Lee, and my brother this evening. As usual, I had a worthy conversation with Brook, albeit a short and interrupted one. It is interesting to my how sometimes thoughts I have about a subject do not get developed and refined until I put them into words. Brook was mentioning that Madeline Engle makes a supposition that perhaps Abraham had in fact failed the test when it came to sacrificing his son. He had chosen law over love. Interesting theory. When I heard that, I thought about how we always assume that the story of Job worthwhile. The more I think about it though, the more it bothers me.

Satan challenges God through his servant Job. As you may know, God accepts the challenge and allows Satan to torture Job in numerous ways to get him to crack. Job doesn't, and at the end God rewards him above and beyond anything he had ever had.

When quickly glanced over, it seems like a good lesson in remaining faithful to God, regardless of circumstances. However, when I take it apart, I find it disturbing. If this story were told outside the bible, most people would probably find it sick. Two people arguing over the stamina of another decide to torture him. Two children take a magnifying glass to a small animal and burn it in the sun to see what kind of a squeal it makes.

Job is given new children and wealth at the end of the story. Could other children make up for the violent death of my children? Could someone slaughter my Kathryn and Jacob and then think that offering me two children in their place that would make it all better?

At the end of the story, God makes it clear that Job has no grounds to question him. Why? Because God is stronger? Might makes right? Again, set aside for the moment that this is a biblical story. Would most of us not see it as bullying, that a stronger entity tells a weaker entity to not question the torture the stronger just inflicted?

I know I am bordering, if not entering, blasphemy here, but does it not show poorly on God that he can be goaded into a cosmic "pissing contest" with someone who is supposed to be the personification of Evil? How about rather, 'Satan, I don't give a flying rip what you think of any of my creatures. Your opinion does not matter to me. Go to Hell".

Brook and I both commented that the easiest answer is that the Bible is not to be taken literally. But if you don't, what good is it. If it is not reliable, then all of our notions of God are merely guess work. For all we know then, any or none of the present or historic religions may have been right.

I hate being on this shifting sand. I want answers and there are none to be had.
I have pages more thoughts on this topic, but sleep calls. Good night all. May God be patient with my stumblings in the dark.

God's Hand?

I don't have anything particular to write today, but I have fallen out of the habit - and I want to get back into it. I tend to fuss so long over what I am writing that I become overwhelmed at the thought of doing it. So just type Andy type.

We took Jacob in to get tubes put in his ears today. It is a relatively minor surgery, in fact, it only took a few minutes. I knew that the only real risk in the operation was the anestisia. Ok... now let's swing this whole thing back to God, and my never ending shifting theology (pardon me while I pop an asprin). I really felt a fair amount of fear about Jacob going under. I couldn't help at times envisioning the worst, and what would my response be. Unlike Job, I think bird and heavenward come to mind... that and the destruction of everything within a hundred yards of me. Somehow I do not picture that I would calmly say " the Lord giveth..... blah, blah, blah.....

I find it interesting how my thoughts on these matters have changed over the years. When I merely operated in theory, I was confident that I could answer like Job... this life was only temporary anyway. It seems I am more bonded to this life now, cause I could not now take it so lightly.

What was the deal with Job anyway?... was he that deep? or that simplistic? I tend to think it was simplicity. I have seen some very trusting people, whom I was convinced that they were so simply because they did not know any better. I am convinced that most people are able to survive their Christianity with a fair amount of happiness because they tend to give it very little critical thought.

The only other way I see that Job could have done it, is if he had a very real sense of the prescence of God. That could bring about that level of eternal trust..... This is what I do not have. If Jacob died, I could see no purpose for it... therefore it is random... and how do I trust a God who lets the chips fall where they may. Therefore... God must be in control. But that falls apart for me too. There seems to be too much damn randomness.

In the movie "Signs", Mel Gibsons character states that there are two kinds of people. Those who believe there are no conicidences, that everything is being orchestrated. Others feel that everything is chance, and that there is no one watching out for us. I am terrified at the possibility of the latter. However, I don't think he mentioned a third option. There is someone watching... but he is just doing that.... watching.

I loved in Dogma, when the woman who is "chosen" is talking to Bartleby. She says something to the effect "Remember when you were young... and you didn't question. God was up there, watching over us, and he had a plan, and everything was alright. What I wouldn't give to feel that way again". I think when Kevin Smith wrote that part, he tapped in to what a lot of people feel.

How did I get off on this tangent? Oh yes, Jacob. See, years ago, I would have believed that nothing could have happened to Jacob because I was on God's team; in fact, I was one of the favorites.

Today, I felt a chill and relief when Jacob came out of surgery. Was God's hand on my son today? Or did I just get lucky?

Enjoy the Silence?

Brook and I caught a late midnight showing of Xmen 2 last night over at the Chesterfield. We had an hour or so to kill over at the Steak and Shake before it started. One of the things that we talked about, was the fact that our belief structure is mostly based on hearsay. Christians usually do not choose Christianity over some other religion.

Brook made a comment, something to the effect "The hardest thing to deal with in Christianity is the silence." I couldn't agree more. Job may have been reamed out by God for his presumption, but at least he was acknowledged. I think I begin to understand the psychology of negative attention more and more. Love me or hate me, but don't dismiss me.

I didn't notice the silence earlier in my Christianity, but it is at times now, nearly overwhelming. I can see what draws people to make connections, where there perhaps are none, in order get a sense of the prescence of God. If I believe that God arranged for me to get that job, or meet that person, then he is paying attention. He notices me. And, we have neatly come up with a safe explanation for the things that happen which we don't like. God is saying no, or he is teaching us something. If I get the job, it was the work of the Lord. If I don't get it, well, God just has other things in mind. The important piece though is that I am on his mind and he notices me.

I am not sure where this leaves me. The silence gets worse, not better. I remember in the movie, "Vampires" there was a Catholic priest who was going to exchange the life of some innocents for his eternal mortal life. When asked how he could do this, he replied " I have spent my whole life in the service of the church... I have never seen a miracle, never heard a voice, never had a vision. I am now near the end of my life, and the thought of death terrifies me."

I understand some of his sentiments. In my earlier years of Christianity, Jesus was coming back soon. Heck, for a while there, I almost thought college might be a waste of time since none of us were going to be here anyway. I didn't experience anything supernatural in my life, but I simply figured I wasn't experienced enough yet.. it would come.

However, here I am... twenty years of Christianity later - and I have never seen a miracle, never heard a voice, never had a vision. A few years ago, it occured to me that I may go through my whole life and never experience the voice of God. Beyond that, I may just be a cog in the wheel, or worse yet - maybe part of no plan whatsoever.

How then do I live out Christianity in light of these new perspectives? I am not sure. But the silence is deafining.